Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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