okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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