He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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