it wasn't lemon gatorade
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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