idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
