He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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