what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
