I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
