I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
