Are we in a gay sports bar?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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