You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
