Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
