I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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