quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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