But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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