have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
