She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
