Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
