Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
