Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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