You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
