I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
