Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
