you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
