Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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