saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
