i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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