This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
