I wish I could punch you in the face.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
