PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
