I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize