i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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