Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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