so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Randomize
