i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
