I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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