Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
