roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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