I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
