I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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