this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
