2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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