I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i permit you to call me
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
