There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
