Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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