I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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