He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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