I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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