I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
