Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Randomize