two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
stop calling my apartment porn island.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
